Casper Daily Tribune

LET'S ALL GET IN!

By W. E. VAPLON. Colorado Agricultural College.

They tell us we should buy less clothes, that we should save to lick our foes, and trade our jewelry for a bond to help our boys across the pond. They say that drunkenness is sin, to cut our wine and beer and gin according to the preachers' tell, all sinners surely go to hell.

No man should wear a silken shirt nor with two-dollar neckties flirt, and sox of gaudy, striking hue should be by loyal men taboo, and smokes and treats and costly drinks should be curtailed by genial ginks. They want our women to refrain from high heel shoes, they hurt the brain. According to the powers that be, all costly needless lingerie should be locked up in storage cold, or better yet, for thrift stamps sold; no corset, low-neck gown or paint, a woman now must be a saint; candy, soda and chewing gum, must help to smash the horrid Hun, and heedless of our hearts' desire, all should simplicity admire.

So far, so good; but tell us why, in every store that we pass by, such flashy goods should be displayed, for women, man and comely maid. A woman can't find low-heel shoes, nor man a tie of modest hues; gowns are more low and skirts more up, and stockings striped to scare a pup. Such hats no moral ever saw, they're bigger than allow by law, and things made only to adorn would plumb delight September Morn. Why tempt us with the things that damn, why doesn't our old Uncle Sam send those who make such stuff over the ocean's bosom rough, or send them out to save the wheat and corn and spud and sugar beet. Why rob the children of their play, why make the women mow the hay when ten times fourteen thousand men might handle plow instead of pen.

Let idle rich themselves amuse or some big useful labor choose: let all put shoulder to the wheel and make deluded Wilhelm feel that everyone in this great land is going to fight to beat the band; the big thing now is over there, let none himself or treasure spare.